007: 6 Strategies to Overcoming Decision Fatigue
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Show Notes
So drained from the little decisions that you just can't make one more decision for the day? That's called decision fatigue! But the good news is, I have 6 strategies to help you overcome decision fatigue so you can save your brain power for your bigger decisions and live with less overwhelm.
Links Mentioned:
· Three Decision Instincts: Anchored Decisions podcast, episode 1
· Free Decision Compass: Set the lens from which you make your decisions. www.anchoreddecisions.com/compass
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Transcript
Oh, the constant demand for decision-making throughout your day. What should you make for dinner this week? What should you do today? Should you buy the name brand or the generic? What should you wear today? Should you say yes to that volunteer position? What should you buy your nephew for his birthday? The mental exhaustion of those daily choices can leave you so drained that you have no brain power left for the big decisions, like whether to let your mother-in-law move in with you or whether to make that big career change. There's a name for this overwhelm and that is decision fatigue. So tune in, as I share some practical tips on how you can overcome decision fatigue.
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Imagine your husband booked a dream vacation for you and your family. But it's next week. While you're super excited to go, you now have to face all of the decisions associated with this trip. What activities will you do? Should you drive or fly? What clothing items will you need? Which toys and kit entertainment items should you pack? Should you eat out, pack food or make food there? Whew, by the time your husband asks you what you want for dinner that night, you are spent! "I can't make one more decision today. Just pick something."
Think through all of the decisions you've had to make recently. Did you feel overwhelmed? Were you bogged down by the end of the day because of those decisions? I know recently I was hanging out in Georgia with my husband's grandma and family, and we had to decide whose house we were doing lunch at and whose house for dinner and what activities for the day and what time we were meeting up. And Josh's grandma at one point just said, "I'm done making decisions for the day" and she wanted someone else to decide for her.
So it is hard when people put the pressure on us to be the decision makers. And a lot of times as moms, we're the ones making the decisions for our family, for our kids, for ourselves.
What do you think some of the most time consuming decisions are that drag people down? .
According to a Barclays study, buying a sofa takes people 24 hours and five minutes. What color to paint a room: 18 hours and 53 minutes. If you listen to episode two, you would see that my sister is about five minutes, but I'm probably closer to that 18 hour mark. What to buy someone for their birthday: 11 hours and 49 minutes. Okay. That seems like a little bit of a stretch to me, but maybe for someone who's a really good friend, but really hard to buy for, maybe you'd reach that eleven hours? What to wear for a special occasion: three hours and 40 minutes. I think that one might be a little under, if you consider going shopping as part of that decision making time. What perfume to buy: three hours and 12 minutes. Whether to buy the items in your online shopping basket: one hour and 37 minutes. What to do for the weekend: one hour and eight minutes. What to tackle on your to-do list: 27 minutes and 11 seconds. Now if you just jumped right into tackling that to-do list, you might not have wasted so much time. You could have gotten a lot done in that 27 minutes. What to eat for dinner: 22 minutes and 44 seconds. And what to watch on Netflix: 23 minutes. My husband and I were just in that predicament the other day. Spent as much time finding the episode as we would of just watching a whole episode. And then finally buying a car 14 hours and 39 minutes to several months. I know my husband is in the several months camp because it took him a really long time before finally pulling the trigger on his Rivian that he bought recently.
So do you feel that you spend more time or less time on these type of decisions?
Where am I overthinkers at that spend more time? I mean of all problems to have overthinking doesn't seem like a horrible one, right? You just liked to be cautious, evaluate all angles, pay attention to the details. No big deal. Until you add up exactly what it's costing you. Overthinking, as we saw is a huge waste of time. . At the end of the day, when we waste time on all the little decisions it really takes away from being able to make those big, impactful decisions. We've nothing left in our brainpower.
As I said in the intro, there is a name for this overwhelm and it is called decision fatigue. And no, it's not all in your head. Actually it is in your head, just not in that way. Studies have shown that decision fatigue is linked to changes in brain activity and glucose metabolism in the prefrontal cortex that results in depletion of cognitive resources associated with making choices and exercising self-control.
So while I'm a psychology nerd and love all those technical terms, in layman's terms, that means that too many decisions can literally ruin your ability to make good choices. Whomp, whomp. The good news is you can get better at the daily decisions in order to save your brain power for the things that really need it.
So I am going to go through the six P's to overcoming decision fatigue.
1. pray
Turn to God. God should always be your first resource, not your last resort though, I think for these little decisions, we forget to turn to God. And I always thought God didn't really care about those little decisions, like what should I make for dinner? Or what dress should I wear to our girls night? But like the loving father that he is, he does care because he cares about your peace, if not also about the decision itself, he wants you to have peace of mind and not be stressed over these decisions.
He also cares about you being a good steward of your time, which means not wasting time overthinking and being dragged down by little decisions.
So start your day with prayer, asking God to help you to feel at peace with your decisions throughout your day. And don't be afraid to ask for help with those little decisions. Start praying for just those little silly things. And the spirit might just lay something on your heart or provide a sign of confirmation, so you can step forward and take action and not be bogged down by them.
2. Purge
This is to simplify your options. So the more choices you have, the more opportunities to find the perfect fit, right? So it should be easier to make decisions. But that's actually not the case. More choices, just cause more overwhelm, blocking your ability to choose quickly and efficiently.
There was actually a study done on the sale of jams and they set up a booth in a market where you could come sample the different jams and then have them available for purchase. And the booth that had 21 different flavors. I think it was 21, don't mark my words on that. They had just an abundance of flavors and it drew in the most amount of people to the booth. Yet when they did the experiment again with only having seven jams available, they might not have had as many people coming to take samples, but they actually sold more jams. And it's because of that overwhelm that when you have too many options, your brain is not wanting to commit to one thing, you're afraid of missing out on the better option, you are overwhelmed with which one you should pick that you decide to not make any choice at all it step away from that decision. So try to purge the number of options that you have, or allow yourself to have, so you can decide quicker.
There are two ways to purge your options. Number one is to literally purge and get rid of things. So clean out your closet, your recipe book, your craft supplies, so you don't have as many items to compare and decide between. Or instead of completely getting rid of things, you could set some aside. So I have this huge recipe book, and my kids are too picky right now to enjoy a lot of the recipes that Josh and I used to love before having kids. So I have set those recipes aside so they're not getting in the way and bogging me down from flipping through my cookbook and finding recipes that I can make for the week. But they're still there for down the line, in the future when I want to make those recipes. But they're not causing overwhelmed by being a part of my regular cookbook.
It's the same way with your clothes. You could set aside any clothes that aren't in season right now, or clothes that you know you won't be wearing any time soon. Have a separate place in your closet for certain outfits and clothes that aren't your regulars or for certain occasions. And that way clearing the clutter will simplify your options.
It'll make it so much easier for you to go through your closet and find the one you want to wear.
Now number two would be to limit the choices that you let yourself compare. So let's say you're comparing new vacuums. Do a little research and quickly narrow it down to two or maybe three to analyze. Do not watch YouTube tutorials and deep dive into reviews for 10 different vacuums. That is such a waste of time. Or maybe if you go out to dinner and the menu is overwhelming, choose one of your go-to favorite categories. Like just go to the salad section or the burgers and sandwiches section and just compare options from those sections rather than comparing a salad with a burger, with mahi, with a chicken dish, with a pasta. Go to a go-to and just pick from there. It makes it so much faster and easier. And, you know, you can find something that you like from a category that you like.
Or maybe if you're picking out a dress for a fancy party, grab three to try on not eight. This way, you're limiting your options for yourself so that you keep yourself from being overwhelmed.
3. Pass Off
Delegate it to someone else.
This means to let someone else make the decision for you. And no this does not mean texting your bestie with every outfit choice or every vacuum option and forcing them to pick for you. This means to intentionally assign the task to someone else.
Maybe that's a family member, your spouse, another committee member, or a coworker, that you give them the authority to choose. Now make sure the decision maker understands your preferences and priorities. Perhaps give some clear instructions or parameters to them, and then you have to let go of the perfectionism or the need for control. Because will they always pick what you think is best? Nope. But sometimes the mental break you get for passing off the decision is worth a little bit more mediocre of a result. But also only pass off the things that you are willing to let someone else choose for you. I know sometimes I've been out to dinner before or after a long day with making a lot of decisions that and my brain is just fried and I've told my husband just pick for me, especially when it's a place with a ton of menu options or place we're not familiar with and I don't know exactly what I want. I just pass that off to him and say, pick something. And sure it might not be what I would have chosen. I might not like my food quite as much as the person next to me if I had just chosen that one. But at the end of the day, it's fine. It works. And my brain got a rest. So some decisions that you can delegate and pass off are let your kids pick their sports, activities or their clothes, or what to do this weekend. Let your spouse do the Christmas shopping for their family members. Ask your mom to decide what the plans are for mother's day. Have older kids decide the dinner menu for the week or at least help with it. Let your photographer choose which family portraits to frame instead of you having to go through all the pictures. And have the waiter choose your entree.
4. Plan
Prepare and advance as much as you can. For anything that's possible, make a plan ahead of time to do it. So go through your closet, pick out certain outfits that you will use for specific occasions. Or if you know you have an outing coming up, try things on in advance so you're not scrambling at the last minute. Maybe you stock up on generic gifts for birthdays or teacher appreciation so you can quickly grab something from your gift closet, rather than spending hours searching on Amazon. Maybe you create a five week rotating meal plan or choose to set a time to do your weekly meal planning. And you may be thinking I don't have time to meal plan or I don't have time to try and outfits ahead of time. You're actually just not prioritizing it. And planning time into your calendar so you're not grabbing takeout again or stressing over missing your reservation because you can't decide what to wear will really help you have more mental clarity.
The other part of planning is to make a time that you plan out to make your decisions. So when do we usually make our decisions? It's at the end of the day after we've already used up all of our brain power for the day, making decisions throughout the day, thinking through things with the kids, getting overwhelmed, tired... I mean, we can hardly pick a Netflix show, let alone anything big and important. So if you have a big decision coming up, make sure you plan ahead of time when you're going to make that decision. Set some time aside when you know that you'll be in a good brain place. Maybe it's first thing in the morning on a Saturday, when you've got your coffee, you let your kids just watch a show so you and your spouse can sit down and work through your decision. So have a plan for when you make your plans.
5. Parameters
Set boundaries, timelines, guidelines. Just like with purging setting parameters around your decision can help reduce the amount of overwhelm. You can set parameters by setting a decision deadline, defining boundaries or creating guidelines.
When it comes to deadlines, Parkinson's law explains how we often use whatever time we have allotted to complete a task. So if you have two weeks to make a decision, it'll take you two weeks. If you have five days, you'll decide in five days. So rather than letting your decisions drag out, give yourself a deadline, whether that's arbitrary or concrete, so you can choose to move forward.
I know for me, I typically need concrete deadlines that are actual deadlines because if I just set a deadline in my head, I don't really stick to it. It's like goals. I'm not a good goalkeeper, unless it actually has a physical or concrete reward at the end. If I hadn't had a launch date for my podcast that was right before our mops Bunco fundraiser so that I could promote my podcast at the fundraiser, I might never have launched my podcast or it would have taken me months and months. But when I knew I had that hard deadline, it helped me make decisions faster, get to work and do the actions needed to launch the podcast. So same with your decisions. If you have that deadline of when you need to decide by, like , if you know that your lease is coming up in a month, then you have a month to decide whether you're going to renew your lease, buy something, rent somewhere else. You have that deadline that gets you to work a little faster.
Now boundaries can also help you set these parameters for your decision-making that'll help you make easier decisions. So things like whether or not to accept or reject an event invite can be easier if you set schedule parameters. So you could say I'm only going to accept one event per weekend, and that way you have to choose between.
Or if you have a family event while your husband's traveling, you might have a boundary and parameter set that you will pick up food rather than cooking so you're not overwhelmed.
You might limit your kids to one afterschool activity per semester, or maybe you accept only volunteer commitments that take less than two hours a week. What are those boundaries you can set to make an easy, yes. And it actually helps you when you explain to others too, if you are a yes person and feel bad saying no to things and you take on too much because of that.
When you have these boundaries set ahead of time, you can say, "I'm really sorry, we've chosen for our own sanity sake to only accept X, Y, Z, and I'm already over committed that time." And then the third thing with these parameters is guidelines. So if you've ever been stumped on a Halloween costume, What should I wear? But you could think of 50 ideas for your cousin's rock and roll retirement party. It's because the theme suddenly narrowed your options for you. So you can create your own themes or guidelines to help shrink the number of ideas you have to think through. So maybe it's summer activities to do with your kids.
You set Monday as exploring a park; Tuesdays you grocery shop and cook dinner together; Wednesday's you do a water activity; and Friday's a movie night. Or maybe you pick themes for your meals: monday's Crock-Pot meal; Tuesday's a Mexican dish; Wednesday's grilled food; Thursdays, try a new recipe; Fridays, get takeout. That makes it so much easier when instead of coming up with, what should I make for dinner? You say, okay, what Crock-Pot meal can I make?
And then also I mentioned this earlier with birthday gifts and having kind of a storage closet, but you could also pick one gift idea for each age group that your kids are to give out at every birthday party. So maybe three-year-olds do you give play doh sets and five-year-olds you give craft supplies or certain board game? And maybe 12 year olds you give sports equipment.
So boom, all of a sudden meals, activity planning, birthday gifts are so much easier, right?
6. Pick and Go
The last P is to pick and go. So learn to trust your instincts and just pick something . This final strategy involves training your mind to make quick decisions and trust your gut instincts. If you go back to episode one on the three decision instincts, one of them is your heart, one's your mind, and one is your gut. And I actually advise against your gut for a lot of things, because your gut sometimes is just based on fear or it doesn't consider all of the facts and the data doesn't look at your heart's long-term desires. But, when it comes to these little decisions, daily decisions, the gut instinct is often your best option. And that will save you from a lot of this decision fatigue that bogs you down.
So often overthinking decisions rise from a lack of self-trust. By choosing quickly and refraining from second guessing yourself, stopping yourself from flip-flopping, you can start to build confidence in your decision-making abilities. Start to flex that muscle, really work it, and embrace the concept of picking and going to make quick choices. So perhaps you saw your favorite trustworthy Instagrammer posts about a vacuum they loved, just choose that one and don't even compare any others. Or maybe you're trying on outfits for an event. Just grab one from your closet, and as long as it actually fits and is clean, go with it.
I'm sure you'll look great. It's in your closet for a reason, you liked it at some point. And maybe you're looking through a menu, just order the first one you see that looks appealing and then close the menu. Don't even look any further. Now will you sometimes choose things you regret? Yes, but that can happen whether you spend two minutes on a decision or two hours. Think about if you've been at a restaurant and you spent like 30 minutes trying to decide what you want, you finally get your food, it's coming out and then you look over and you see someone else's food and said, man, I should've gotten that one. But which one takes less brain power?
It's the just picking and going. So learn to rewire your brain, to let go of perfectionism and make quicker decisions.
So decision fatigue is a real and natural challenge, but it can be overcome. I personally have experienced this by using these six P's to overcome decision fatigue.
I am so much faster at picking food at a restaurant. I am so much faster at choosing outfits for things. I used to literally send my best friends or my parents like 10 different options of clothes before an event. And then I'd come back and "which accessories should I wear?" I mean, it was bad. I was reliant on them to help me decide. I was back and forth. I would literally try on outfit after outfit, after outfit, like multiple times per outfit. That was such a waste of time. And now, grab something from my closet. Looks good enough. It's good to go. And it's so much easier and faster.
So you can use the six P's either individually, or you can combine some of the tactics. Maybe you first narrow things down by purging, and then you just pick and go.
These will make your daily decisions so much faster so now you can avoid that fatigue and focus your brain power on those bigger decisions that need and require a lot more thought and energy. And a lot deeper of a process.
Let's recap the six strategies to overcome decision fatigue.
Prayer – Pray over this decision and your decision-making in general.
Purge – Narrow your choices, either permanently or just for that choice.
Pass off – Assign someone else to make the decision for you.
Plan – Come up with ideas ahead of time or schedule a time to make your decisions.
Parameters – Set some guidelines, limits and boundaries for yourself.
Pick and go – Train your brain to just go with your first gut instinct.
So give these tactics a try and save your brain power for the decisions that have greater implications. Your future less stressed self will thank you for it.
Now while you're here, don't forget this is the last week that you can enter to win my Anchored Decisions podcast launch giveaway, where you get a swag bag full of a decision guide of choice, an anchor bracelet, jewelry, Bible study resources, and a $50 Amazon gift card. So go ahead and leave a rating or review on your favorite podcast player, take a screenshot of it and send it to me either by email or on social media, which you can find those links in the show notes. So that way I'm sure to see it because sometimes they don't post right away. And then for extra entries, you can share this podcast publicly with your friends, making sure to tag me so I'm sure I see it.
Thank you so much for tuning in. I hope you have a great week and are able to make faster, easier decisions every day.
Thank you so much for listening. If you're looking to make better decisions for you, founded on faith and your priorities, go grab my free decision compass. This will help you set the lens from which you make your decision to be sure you're making the best, most intentional decisions. Download it now at anchoreddecisions.com/compass. See you next week for another episode of the Anchored Decisions show.